A Barometer for the Heart
I am Yugo, an elementary school teacher and a father of two.
I have been feeling down lately. I felt so low that I wonder if I have ever felt this way before. To the point where I couldn't even do my daily muscle training... To the point where I had to give up on updating my note articles, which I had kept up for over 100 days... I keenly felt my own powerlessness.
At times like these, I have my own way of gauging how depressed I am. That is...
Which music or songs do I want to listen to?
It is strange, but even though I am listening to the same songs, there are times when they really resonate with me, times when they don't resonate at all, and times when I don't even want to listen to them.
When I am at rock bottom...
Silence. Or, I only want to listen to slow, healing music. I cannot accept various lyrics or noisy sounds at all... When I am like this, I am truly at the very bottom.
When I am just before rock bottom and still have the motivation to try to get back up...
I play instrumental training BGM. I play songs with heavy bass at full volume in the car. My heart starts to feel a little more positive!
When I want to give myself a little push...
I play songs with meaningful lyrics, like those by MOROHA or Pistol Takehara, at full volume in the car.
When I am doing well!
It is not music, but I listen to talks in fields I am interested in, such as finance, training, or self-improvement.
During my recent period of feeling down, I was in a state where I could only accept healing music without lyrics... But that doesn't mean it's bad; it is important to know what state you are in right now. Recognizing and accepting yourself at rock bottom... By looking at yourself from a bird's-eye view in that way, your mind becomes organized, and you start to see what you can't do, what you can do, what you are at fault for, and what is not your responsibility... Just doing this can be a trigger to pull yourself out of rock bottom, even if just a little.
Using music as a barometer for your heart to look at yourself from a bird's-eye view
I recommend it.
By the way, I have now recovered to the point where songs that give me a push resonate with me. Although nothing has been solved yet, I have at least started to see what I can do right now and what I have to do... The road ahead is long, but I will do my best.