A Story About Value

Hello. This is Aosagi.

I recently ate some delicious ohagi.
When I went to the city library for the first time in a while,
it just so happened that an ohagi shop I had been curious about was there selling their goods. Thinking, 'This must be fate...' while being a bit dramatic, I excitedly bought some red bean, kinako, and white sesame ones.
They were small, and I could taste the subtle sweetness of the glutinous rice; they were all very delicious. Eating ohagi makes me feel happy.

Setting the preamble aside, I thought I would write about something I've been pondering lately.

Recently, Yorushika announced the release of their epistolary novel, 'Nininsho' (Second Person).
I decided to buy it without hesitation, but at that moment, a question suddenly popped into my head: where does this feeling of wanting to buy albums and merchandise come from?

I have purchased various things in the past, such as Yorushika's albums, merchandise, and live DVDs.
Of course, that is because I love Yorushika's music and world, but it feels like there is more to it than just that. It's as if the elements contained in my feeling of 'wanting' are not just pure affection...

As a human, I think it's natural to have material desires. They can become rewards for oneself, goals, or even reasons for living.
However, when I think I 'want' a Yorushika work, it comes with the annotation 'because it is a Yorushika work.' I think I am in a state where I find meaning in the act of 'purchasing'—that I would buy it regardless of what kind of work it is, as long as it is by Yorushika. Surely, that precedes any interest or expectation for the work itself, and I end up feeling satisfied by the purchase before I even enjoy the work.
In that case, the value I am feeling no longer lies in the work, but in the existence of Yorushika. Furthermore, it even makes me think that I might be trying to find value in myself for liking Yorushika, and that I am only thinking of Yorushika as an element to decorate myself with.

As long as I am living as myself, it is inevitable that my existence accompanies everything I do. Because it is I myself who thinks and feels everything.
However, even if I try to decorate myself with things that overflow in the world, I think the value remains in those things themselves, and it does not become my own value.
That is precisely why I want to be a person worthy of receiving the things I find valuable, and I hope that after receiving the work, it becomes a part of me.

In other words, while it doesn't change the fact that I will buy what I want, I want to change my mindset when doing so.
I want to face the work after thinking carefully about where I find value and why I want it.

This is not limited to Yorushika, but I wrote this because I had some thoughts while purchasing Yorushika's work recently.

I certainly look forward to new works. However, I felt that buying them with the feeling of 'I want it for now' before reflecting on them was somehow insincere to the creators.
It was a story about how I wanted to cherish not just the broad category of Yorushika, but each and every work and word within it once again.

Well then, until next time.