Women who keep moving forward turn even their weaknesses into opportunities

In the previous columns, we looked at various perspectives on how to become a "woman who isn't underestimated" through career building and networking.
This time, I would like to change the tone a bit and focus on the concept of "weakness." Many people tend to think that "to become strong, one must overcome weakness," but in psychology, it is actually believed that effectively utilizing one's weaknesses and failures is what leads to true strength.
This is because it is precisely when we are hurt by unexpected setbacks or someone's thoughtless words that we gain a great opportunity to re-examine our own potential.

First, I want to re-acknowledge the fact that "failure itself is unavoidable."
On social media, it is easy to see only glittering success stories, and many women may fall into the trap of thinking, "Everyone else is doing well, but I am the only one struggling." However, in reality, almost all people called successful have experienced major setbacks without exception. Ultimately, everyone, regardless of size, hits some kind of wall and goes through the process of overcoming it. So, what is the difference between those who succeed and those who do not? The concept that explains this is "resilience."

Resilience is the ability to bounce back flexibly without breaking when facing adversity or difficulties. It has recently become frequently discussed in psychology and business books.
People with resilience are less likely to get discouraged and can move on to the next action at an early stage because they can think, "I might be able to learn something from this experience" or "there are still opportunities left," even in the midst of adversity. That can be said to be the trick to effectively utilizing "weakness."

As a concrete way to increase resilience, "writing down self-dialogue" is effective. When you are feeling down, use a notebook or a memo app on your smartphone to put your inner voice into words.
By writing down "what is the cause of the pain," "which part is particularly shocking," and conversely, "what can I do right now," it becomes easier to organize your thoughts. Also, by looking at your weaknesses without worrying about the eyes of others, you may see unexpected loopholes or solutions.

Another point that cannot be overlooked is the concept of "self-efficacy" proposed by Canadian psychologist Albert Bandura.
People who can still think, "I might be able to overcome this," even after experiencing failure or setbacks, have a high probability of actually taking the next action. Conversely, if self-efficacy is low, one thinks, "It's no use" or "I can't do it," and cannot move forward from there. If time passes while you are depressed and doing nothing, the road to becoming a "woman who isn't underestimated" will only grow more distant.

However, accepting weakness is not an easy thing to do.
Pride may get in the way, and you might feel, "If I admit failure, will others look down on me?" But in reality, people who can be open about their weaknesses tend to be liked by those around them, who see them as "human" or "easy to trust." It has been shown that people who can honestly talk about their failures and shortcomings are actually more likely to succeed in their interpersonal relationships.

So, how do you turn weakness into a "weapon"?
First, I want to think about exploring how your weaknesses can be useful to those around you. For example, because you have experienced failure, you can provide advice so that new people do not repeat the same mistakes. Because you know what it is like to suffer a setback, you can provide support that is close to your juniors and colleagues. That is a great value that people who act tough or only talk about success cannot provide.

Furthermore, as a benefit of exposing your weaknesses, there is the fact that "it becomes easier for those around you to help."
People are often hesitant to approach someone who looks like a perfect superhuman. Conversely, if you express your weaknesses appropriately, those around you may feel, "I might be able to help a little," and it becomes easier for them to offer a helping hand.
That fosters teamwork and, as a result, will also lead to increasing your evaluation and presence.

Of course, there are tricks to how you reveal your weaknesses.
If you pour out too many negative emotions on social media, it may create worry or distance rather than empathy.
Therefore, what is necessary is to also firmly convey the "positive beyond the negative." For example, if you post, "I was bad at this, but I was able to overcome it a little by trying this," along with your process of trial and error, it is easier to get reactions like, "That method seems useful" or "I'll try it too," which leads to positive communication.

What is important here is the skill of "assertive communication," which I have touched upon several times in previous columns. Even when showing weakness, do not blame the other person more than necessary or vent your emotions too much. Convey only what you felt and thought, and logically summarize what you want to do about it. If you ask for the other person's opinion or help in that way, mutual understanding is more likely to proceed smoothly.
Isn't this the essence of communication that "uses weakness as a weapon," which is different from mere "self-deprecating talk" or "tragic heroine thinking"?

At the same time, what is indispensable for overcoming setbacks is to refrain from "comparing yourself with others." Especially on social media, it is easy to see only the cut-out, brilliant parts of others. However, what we should really focus on is not comparison with others, but "comparison with yesterday's self."
Have you made a little more progress than yesterday, or have you handled it a little better than last time? This accumulation of small senses of achievement is the key to fostering self-efficacy and building a strong and flexible heart.

And, to move forward while accepting your own weaknesses, I feel that it is most important to "increase the number of trials."
If you are afraid of failure and do not act, you will stay in the same place forever. If there is an event, seminar, or project that interests you even a little, gather your courage and participate. Even if you fail there, there is always something to be gained. A "woman who isn't underestimated" might be said to be a person who has the perspective of viewing failure and setbacks not just as a negative, but as a stepping stone for growth.

The theme this time was "using weakness as a weapon," but this is by no means encouraging laziness.
Rather, women who can acknowledge their own weaknesses and utilize them constructively have the greatest strength. A "flexible and strong" way of life should be nurtured not by doing everything perfectly, but within the flexibility of sometimes asking for help from those around you, sometimes opening a breakthrough yourself, and turning even setbacks into opportunities.

Next time, I would like to delve deeper into "mental health" for resetting the wounds and stress that occur in daily life.
I hope to provide hints for women to maintain their physical and mental balance and walk a life where they are "not underestimated," while taking up psychological approaches and practical relaxation methods. Please look forward to it.