We Change Slowly #ShirokumaLiteratureClub

I will be participating in this project.

With the theme of "slowly," I wrote a story about small changes.
I would be happy if you could read it as a quiet comedy.

“Let’s take it slowly. You can’t overcome being timid overnight.”
The instructor, Kurosaki, said this and then nodded slowly to reassure them.

“Course for Overcoming Timidity” In a room at the community center with that written on the door, folding chairs were arranged in a circle.
There were seven participants. Everyone was sitting on the edge of their chairs. Not a single person was using the backrest.

Kurosaki looked at them and nodded with satisfaction.
“That’s good. A truly wonderful atmosphere. Everyone, you already have the aptitude.”
“Aptitude?”
There was a small, murmuring voice.
Kurosaki explained calmly.
“Being timid is a talent, you see. You are cautious, you can read the room, and you can anticipate and imagine the worst-case scenarios. Ordinary people can’t easily do that.”

A man who looked like a salaryman sitting at the edge timidly raised his hand.
“Um... does that mean we don’t have to overcome it?”
Kurosaki thought for a moment.
“No, we will overcome it.”
Then he lowered his voice slightly.
“However, cautiously.”

Several people nodded deeply.

Kurosaki wrote “Session 1” on the whiteboard.
He took two steps back to look at it.
“...Is it a bit too big, perhaps?”
Kurosaki took the chalk and erased about half of it.
“No, let’s redo it.”

He wrote it again.

Session 1.

He stepped back to look again.
“...”

Kurosaki added a small “kana” (I wonder) to the end.

Session 1, I wonder.

Seeing that, some of the participants nodded as if relieved.
Kurosaki put down the chalk and cleared his throat.
“Now, let’s begin the first training.”

He paused for a moment.

“It is the practice of taking a deep breath while being watched by others.”
The air in the circle tightened slightly.
Kurosaki smiled.

“It’s okay. I’m not good at it either.”


***


The course was held every Wednesday.
The first training was truly just deep breathing.
They formed a circle, and one by one, they stood up.
And then, they took a deep breath while being watched.

That was all.

The first week, everyone was awkward.
By the second week, their breathing became a little deeper.
By the third week, there was applause when they finished.

Kurosaki wrote on the whiteboard

Deep breathing
Success

He thought for a moment and erased “Success.”

“...Is the word ‘success’ a bit too much pressure?”

Done

He rewrote it, but immediately erased that too.

In the end,

Deep breathing

was all that remained.


***

Fourth week.
Kurosaki wrote on the whiteboard.

Second training
Say your name clearly

After writing it, he erased it again.
He erased “clearly.”
He thought for a moment.

He wrote “if possible.”

Second training
Say your name if possible

Some of the participants nodded.
They stood up in turn and said their names.
At first, their voices were small.
But as it went around, they gradually got louder.
The last person said it clearly.

“I am Tanaka.”

A small round of applause broke out.
Kurosaki also applauded.
“That’s wonderful.”
The salaryman-like man raised his hand.
“Teacher.”
“Yes.”
“I don’t really understand.”

Kurosaki was a little surprised.

“In what way?”
The man said.
“In the end, what is the point of this training?”

Kurosaki thought for a moment.

“Well... it’s mental preparation, you could say. It’s a step toward being able to say you don’t like something when you don’t like it.”
Then a woman said.
“Teacher.”
Kurosaki turned around.
“Yes.”
“Teacher, your voice is a little quiet.”

Kurosaki froze for a moment.

“...Ah, I’m sorry.”


***


The following week.

The participants were sitting quite naturally.
Some people were using the backrests.
When they formed the circle, someone started talking.

“I was able to voice my opinion at work the other day.”
“I was able to correct my order to the shop clerk.”
“I turned down a drinking party I couldn’t refuse before.”

Kurosaki nodded many times.
“That is wonderful.”
The salaryman-like man said.
“Teacher.”
“Yes.”
“What is today’s task?”

Kurosaki stood in front of the whiteboard.
He held the chalk.
He thought for a moment.
He wrote.

Final training

Kurosaki looked at it and immediately erased it.
“Final” might be pressure.
He thought for a moment and rewrote it.

Next training

The man said.
“Teacher, since we’re here.”
“Yes.”
“Why don’t you join us in the training, Teacher?”

The woman said.
“That’s right, let’s do it together.”

Seven people looked at Kurosaki.

He took a step forward.
Kurosaki cleared his throat.
“Uh...”

Seven people were watching.

He paused for a moment.

“Perhaps I should participate in this course as well.”
Kurosaki said as if resigned.
“There’s an empty seat.”
The woman gestured to the seat next to her.

He walked to the chair in the circle.
And sat in the empty seat.

The salaryman-like man said.
“Well then, Teacher.”
Kurosaki looked up.
“Yes.”

“Let’s start with deep breathing.”

Kurosaki took a slow breath in.

Seven people were watching.

Kurosaki exhaled.
The tension in his shoulders eased a little.

One person applauded.
Eventually, everyone applauded.

Before that applause died down, the salaryman-like man said in a voice that was remarkably more resonant than before.

“Teacher!”
“Yes.”
“It would be a waste for this course to end today.”

Kurosaki was a little taken aback.

“Yes, well... it was planned for five sessions, after all.”
“Let’s extend it.”
The woman said confidently, while leaning back deeply into her chair.

The gazes of the seven people were fixed on Kurosaki all at once.

They were not the timid gazes from before.
They were sharp, confident gazes that wouldn’t let their prey escape.

“Ah, um... that would require checking the community center’s reservation status and my own schedule...”

Kurosaki’s voice became smaller and smaller.

“Teacher.”
The man leaned forward.
“You’re the one who taught us that if we don’t like something, we should say so, right?”
“Yes, that is true, but...”

“Then, if you don’t dislike it, Teacher, let’s do it.”
“Let’s do it!”
“You can do it, Teacher!”

The voices of the seven “former-timid” people echoed powerfully in the room.

Kurosaki looked up at the weak words “Next training” left on the whiteboard.
With trembling hands, he took out his planner and opened the blank page for next week.
Kurosaki gently closed the planner.
He felt as if it had become just a little quieter.

I want to refuse.

However, faced with students who had grown so impressively, he couldn’t bring himself to say “NO.”

“...Understood. Let’s do it next week.”

When Kurosaki answered in a voice like a mosquito’s hum, the loudest applause of the day broke out.

Kurosaki took a deep breath, his second of the day.

(End)