To Moms and Dads Who Try Too Hard: Why You Don't Need to Be Perfect

"I have to be a good mother."
Before I knew it, I was always thinking that.

Make proper meals,
be kind without getting angry,
and accept my child's feelings.

Even though I understood it in my head,
reality never went well.

Chased by time and feeling irritated,
I would end up speaking harshly,
and regret it while looking at their sleeping face.

I was repeating those kinds of days.


But, at one point, I suddenly thought.

"Does a perfect mother even exist in the first place?"

Children grow every day,
and they aren't the same as yesterday.

Their moods are different,
what they can do changes,
and what they ask for changes too.

Yet, I was trying to
"fit myself into an ideal image of a mother."That might have meant


I wasn't really looking at my child, even though I thought I was.The more I try to be perfect, the more painful it becomes.I focus on what I couldn't do,


and end up blaming myself.

But in reality,
there must be so many things I am doing right.

So I decided to



"stop aiming to be a perfect mother."
Instead, what I want to cherish is "this child right now."


Is today a day they want to be pampered, or a day they want to do things alone?By listening to my child's state and voice at any given moment, I will interact with them flexibly.

It's okay to have days that don't go well.
It's okay to have days where I get angry.

Even then,
I can just say "I'm sorry" and start over.


Even if I'm not perfect,

I am still being a proper mother.

In fact, perhaps it's precisely because I'm not perfect that



I can grow together with my child.


Instead of comparing ourselves to the sparkling parenting we see on social media, let's look at the child right in front of us.