| Rokke's Growth Diary | I'm No Match for You: The Theory of the Daughter Being the Strongest

Today, I want to talk about an incident that made me think that even if someone has an intellectual disability, regardless of what those around them might think, that person might actually be the strongest.

My daughter has severe cerebral palsy and an intellectual disability.

This happened on Setsubun the other day.
Thinking the younger children would enjoy it, I asked my husband to play the role of the ogre.
I placed a green polo shirt and an ogre mask I made out of construction paper in the entryway, and we were all set.

The result was a huge success.
The children were crying their eyes out.
The youngest is only a few months old, but seeing their older brother crying, they were so surprised that they started wailing too!

The middle child can't speak well yet, but they desperately tried to convey that they were scared and clung to me.

Since I was worried about them accidentally swallowing the beans, we threw marbles to drive the ogre away.
The ogre retreated safely.

In the midst of that commotion, I suddenly realized something.
My daughter, Rokke, wasn't bothered at all and was just doing what she wanted to do, as always.

Rokke has rarely been afraid of anything since she was little.
She's fine even if I take her into a dark place.
I'm sure if we went to a haunted house, Rokke would be the one walking through with confidence, and I might be the one making all the noise.

—

Another day. An incident at the local Aeon mall.

While I was shopping with the younger child, I ran into a child I knew. They were much younger than Rokke.

"What are you doing?"
In the flow of that casual conversation, the child pointed at Rokke and asked,

"What grade is that kid in?"

When I answered, "She's in the sixth grade of elementary school now," the child looked a bit surprised and said,

"Sixth grade? Whoa."

At that moment, a magnitude 10 earthquake occurred inside me 🫨

I couldn't process what had happened, and I was just desperate to get through the situation.

After we parted ways, a sense of frustration slowly set in.

But at the same time, I remembered something from the past.
When I jokingly teased a friend's mischievous son about his behavior, saying, "What's that all about? (lol)"

The boy's mother replied,

"I don't remember raising him that way (lol)."
It was a long time ago, but for some reason, it suddenly came back to me.
It's true that parents and children are separate. It's not the parent's responsibility.
Is the child just immature (?)?

I reached that understanding.

But right in front of me was Rokke, who wasn't bothered by anything.

Rokke, who was just living in her own world as always.
Seeing her, I couldn't help but whisper in my heart,
"I'm sorry. I was too weak! I thought I was getting stronger, but I'm still no match for you~"
Any words, any attitude—the weight changes depending on the state of the heart of the person receiving them.

That was a day I felt that once again.
More than the ogre of Setsubun,

More than the casual remark of a child I didn't know,

The strongest one of all was—

Rokke, who noticed nothing, cared about nothing, and was just being herself.
If there is a mother out there who is hurt by someone's words,

I would like you to take a quiet look at the "person who isn't bothered" standing right next to you.
Perhaps that child is already standing in the strongest place of all.
Though, if you are hurt, that's a different story.