What should I cherish as I go through life?

*Approximately 900 characters.

Lately, there are more days when I don't eat dinner with my eldest son.

I have three sons.

A third-year junior high student, a sixth-grade elementary student, and a fourth-grade elementary student.

My eldest son is preparing for entrance exams, and
there are many days when he doesn't eat dinner with us because of cram school.

Even on holidays, he seems to find it more fun to
go out with his friends than to go out with the family.

The younger two are still in elementary school, and of course, they are adorable.

But my second son will also be a junior high student next year.

He has always been the type who
loves spending time noisily with friends, so
he will likely grow independent from his parents quickly.

Before I knew it, I found myself doting too much on my third son.

Google Photos
sends me old pictures without me even asking.

"8 years ago today."

On the screen,
my three sons are dancing enthusiastically in front of the TV
to a Minions song.

Photos can rewind time.

But reality cannot be rewound.

Today, my eldest son is at cram school again,
and there is one empty seat at the dinner table.

Sometimes I find myself staring at those photos,
and tears naturally well up in my eyes.

The days when we walked to nursery school holding small hands.

It would be a complete traffic violation now, but

with my second son in the front basket,
my eldest in the back,
and my third son on my back.

I used to ride my mama-chari bike with all three of them,
running around everywhere every day.

When I looked back while waiting at a traffic light,
all three of them would be asleep.

Back then,
that was just my ordinary daily life.

Come to think of it, when my children were small,

I hardly ever sat on the living room sofa.

When I did, all three would climb onto my lap at once, forming a three-layer stack.
They would start fighting over "who gets to sit on Mom's lap,"
and I would be buried under the children,
unable to even see the TV.

They would follow me even to the bathroom,

and I would think, "Please, just leave me alone..."

There were many days I felt that way.

Now, even if I sit on the sofa,
only my third son comes over.

Even though I wanted to watch TV so much back then,
it's too quiet now.

If the me from back then were asked,
"Would you do it all over again?"

"For three days, I'd do it gladly."

I would answer.

But knowing I can never go back makes me cry.

"Mom."

The number of times I'm called that
is also gradually decreasing.

Of course,
I know that is part of growing up.
It is a happy thing, too.

It's just a little lonely.

My hands
are gradually becoming free.

I
still want to cherish them so much.

However,
those hands are slowly letting go of mine.

From now on, what should I cherish and live for?