[Marriage Hunting | Self-Introduction] I went from the bottom of the dating pool to marriage

Between the ages of 24 and 29, I used 3 marriage agencies and
dating apps, and met 143 men.
At 31, I registered my marriage with a man I met on a dating app.
Now I have two children.

This time, I will write a self-introduction.

I spent at least 400,000 yen and 5 years on marriage hunting.

I was curious myself, so I looked into how much I had spent on marriage hunting until now.

It is roughly just under 400,000 yen.

At the second and third marriage agencies,
I had my photos taken at quite a nice place.

It probably cost over 30,000 yen, but since I don't have the itemized list of photo shoot expenses,
I estimated it on the low side.

If you include transportation costs for dates,
it cost even more.

However, I have absolutely no regrets
about the time and money I spent on marriage hunting.

Almost no dating experience until age 23

Originally, until I graduated from university, I had
no decent dating experience.

During my university years,
・I just packed my schedule with part-time jobs at Christmas
・I couldn't really keep up with my friends' dating stories
I was in a dull state like that.

During my university graduation trip,
I had a very shocking experience.

I went to an overseas beach resort, and
while walking around town with my female friends,
a local person spoke to us.

They seemed to be able to speak a little Japanese,

👨"(Pointing at my friend) You have a boyfriend,
you also have a boyfriend.
(Pointing at me) You don't!"

they said.

It was true, but I felt like someone had clearly told me,

"You aren't popular, and it's oozing out of you!"

and I was incredibly shocked...

Started marriage hunting at a marriage agency at 24

Even so, I attended a friend's wedding for the first time at 23.

I thought, marriage is nice.

However, as a working adult, I had no opportunities to meet people,
and before I knew it, I was 24.

I didn't feel like I could get married if I just spent my life like this, so I registered at a marriage agency.

Even from there, things didn't go well...

・I found a boyfriend at a singles party I attended because I was bored of matchmaking, but it didn't lead to marriage

・At the second marriage agency,
I made it to serious dating, but we broke up after 3 months

・At the third marriage agency,
I went on 5 dates during casual dating, but I broke up with him because I didn't think we could get married

At the third marriage agency, after turning down the person I had gone on 5 dates with during casual dating, I decided to stop matchmaking for once and wanted to try dating apps with all my might, so I suspended my membership.

Started my final marriage hunting effort at 29

At that time, I was 29 and my friends were all getting married one after another.

I am truly sorry to say this, but
I was not in a situation where I could be happy for others back then.

I felt really down when I was invited to three weddings by friends in quick succession.

Deciding I couldn't just stay depressed,
I took massive action.

・Used multiple matching apps to the fullest and
packed my schedule with first dates

・Participated in matchmaking parties

・To avoid being passive,
I took the initiative to ask out people I wanted to see again and planned the date locations myself

I felt that the only way to get rid of my anxiety
was to take action.

I successfully met my current husband through a matching app, and we registered our marriage two years after we met.

Now, I have even adopted a cat (a rescue cat), which was a dream of mine back when I was hunting for a spouse, and
fortunately, I have also been blessed with a child.

Why I started this note

Looking back, I felt truly lonely when I was hunting for a spouse.

I thought to myself that my friends were all married and must be busy.

When you just keep sending as many likes as possible on matching apps, you end up feeling a sense of emptiness later on...

I know that if you don't take action, you won't get results, so I did it, but the harder I worked, the more exhausted I became.

Therefore, I understand the pain of those currently struggling with marriage hunting all too well.

I would be happy if I could write articles about topics that might make people hunting for a spouse feel a little more at ease, or share what worked for me, and be of even the slightest help.

👇 I have published a book on marriage hunting on Kindle.

👇 Click here for an article on the pros and cons of using three different marriage agencies