For those who feel down comparing their English skills to others

Something that many Japanese English learners struggle with.

That is,

"I can't speak English as fluently as others"
"I don't want to speak English in front of Japanese people who are better at it than me"

In short, this is a struggle caused by "comparing yourself to others".

A woman who lost confidence in her English after being surrounded by returnees

A story from a member of our couple's English community.

She said that even though she was good at English in high school, she lost her confidence after entering a university with many returnees.

Certainly, no matter how good you were at English in a Japanese high school, you can never compete with fluent returnees.

She said that even after becoming a working professional, she was afraid to speak English, especially when other Japanese people were around, and had a significant psychological block.she said.

Time and effort spent on English = English age

I told her this:

"The amount of time and effort you've put into English is like your age. In a way, compared to you, I'm like a very old 'grandmother' when it comes to English (laughs)."

I said.

She was a woman with a young child. So, I said this to her:

"Let's say your child is two years old.

Would you compare that child to another five-year-old and think, 'Why is my child so bad at talking compared to that one?'"

You wouldn't think that, would you? The same applies to English.

If we define your 'English age' by the time and effort you have put into English, that length varies greatly from person to person.

As for where that difference comes from, it is simply a matter of whether English has been a high or low priority in your life up until now.

The priority of English in your life

People who are currently in the middle of raising children likely have days where they feel, 'This is no time to be studying English.'

Some people have to set English aside for caregiving. Others may have had periods where they were away from English due to a major illness of their own or a family member's.

In our lives, there are times when the priority of English drops for various reasons, aren't there?

I would like to suggest that you think of such 'time spent not studying English' as a state where you were 'frozen in storage'.

There is a sci-fi movie called 'Passengers' starring Jennifer Lawrence and Chris Pratt.

The story is about many people boarding a spaceship to migrate to a distant star from an Earth that has become uninhabitable due to environmental pollution.

However, it takes 120 years to reach the destination star. If they were just on the spaceship normally, they would reach the end of their lives before arriving. That is why the passengers enter hibernation capsules one by one, spending the travel time without aging.

However, the story of this movie is about two people, a man and a woman, who wake up midway for a certain reason...

What was important in your life until now?

If you feel depressed thinking, 'I'm not as good at English as that person,' why not try thinking, 'You were inside a hibernation capsule.'

You had things more important than English, such as child-rearing, caregiving, illness, work, hobbies, or volunteer activities, up until now, didn't you?

In other words, during that time, you were in a frozen state.Meanwhile, other people were accumulating their English time.

Since returnees used English for chatting with friends and for school classes, it is only natural that English was a high priority for them. And surely, they must have struggled much more than we did to improve their Japanese skills.

In my case, I am not raising children, and for now, there is no need for me to provide nursing care. I have worked in English for a long time, and my husband is American, so English has been a high priority in my life.

Whether English has been a high priority in your life so far or not—that is the only difference.

That is why there is no point in comparing yourself to others.

It is the same as how there is no point in comparing ages.

No one would think, 'I am 30, but that person is 40. I am ashamed of being 30.' You would just accept the fact that 'I am 30 and that person is 40.'That is just a fact.

In the same way, you and that person simply have different'English ages.'

Returnees might be your classmates at university, but they have dedicated much more time and effort to English than you have. It is meaningless to compare yourself to someone who is on a different playing field.

Even if they are your university classmates, their English age is just'Oh, they are older than me in terms of English. That's all.'that.

Of course,

'I wish I had worked harder on my English back then.'
'I could have studied English if I had wanted to, but I was lazy.'

You might have regrets like these. Everyone has them. Of course, I do too.

But including those times, and including the times when childcare, nursing care, work, or hobbies took priority over English, isn't all of that your life up until now?

Therefore, there is no need for any self-deprecating thoughts like 'I'm embarrassed' or 'I'm still not good enough.'

Let's stop comparing ourselves to others, thinking 'that person is better than me' or 'I am better than that person.'

Let's increase our English time so that our English age can be even a little higher than it was yesterday.

How was it? I would be happy if you gained even a little bit of insight for yourself right now.

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