Pink Grapefruit

Feelings are sometimes named only after the fact.

At the time, I didn't really understand,
it just felt a little sour deep in my chest.

Even though I should have forgotten by now,
the evening sky,
a chime ringing in the distance,
or a casual remark
suddenly brings it all back.

Was that love?
Was it loneliness?
Or was it
just simple expectation?

Even now,
I cannot say for sure.

These are the feelings
from before they turned sweet,
left behind on the other side of time.

Pink Grapefruit
aco

It's okay.

Whatever you were doing,

you were free to do it,

whatever you were doing,

it's okay.

But,

I wonder what you're doing now.

Do you remember

even a little bit

about that time?

Will I get

a reply?

……Maybe not.

Did you forget?

That can't be true.

……Or so I think.

Inside my chest

it's a little sour

Up to my throat

it slowly spreads

Even though I don't want to think about it

I find myself thinking of you

Even though I want to forget

I don't want to forget

Ah

already

I'll admit it

It's still

a bit too close

to be just a memory

But

to call it nothing at all

is a little bitter

Just like a pink grapefruit

Bitter,

sour,

and just a little sweet.

Even though it's not fun,

it's fun.

How frustrating.

To think it would,

end up like this.

—

Afterword


I don't think all the emotions that have passed by,
turn into beautiful memories.

Some are bitter,
some are sour,
and some are just a little sweet.

Even feelings that couldn't be named at the time,
can have a strange taste,
when you suddenly remember them later.

It's a bit too close to be a memory,
and a bit too bitter to call it nothing at all.

I will leave that temperature,
exactly as it is.

Just like a pink grapefruit,
remaining bitter, sour, and just a little sweet.