A Marriage Proposal Based on the Belief That 'Surf Shorts Are Hot This Summer'

When you live in Okinawa, your sense of time often gets buggy, much like Urashima Taro. It's as if I learned the theory of relativity in Okinawa before I learned it from the universe.

In the first place, a sense of time is something that cannot be relied upon at all.

During summer vacation as a child, no matter how energetically I played under the sun, I could still afford to think, 'Is it only July?' But once it hit August 27th, I would start to panic, thinking, 'Is it already ending?' and by the time I started my homework, it was too late. In the end, I would reach the first day of school without finishing my homework. The blank workbooks in my school bag felt strangely heavy.

As you get older, it becomes even more serious. I feel like I just said 'Happy New Year' a moment ago, but before I know it, spring is over. To have time pass without any sense of fulfillment—that is the height of carelessness.

What makes that unreliable sense of time even crazier is Okinawa. While living here, this place started to look like the Dragon Palace. Even if I look at a clock, it never moves according to time.

If you go to a convenience store on a Monday, you can't buy Jump and you lament, 'Anmayo,' and the bus timetable is just for decoration. Okinawans are people who say 'Nankurunaisa' while chatting away without worrying about a thing.

To begin with, the way of counting is different.

'Tiichi, Tachi, Miichi, Yuuchi, Ichichi, Muuchi, Nanachi, Yaachi, Kukunuchi, Tu.'

It takes 1.5 times longer than usual to count to ten. When I came here as a tourist, I thought, 'This relaxed time is the wonderful thing about Okinawa.' Not being chased by a clock, looking at the sea, and not caring if I was a little late. I longed for the atmosphere of that southern island, and I must have crossed over to the Dragon Palace to save a turtle.

However, when you live here, the story changes.

No matter what they do, Okinawans move like turtles. Even while saying they are in a hurry, their stride doesn't change, and they end up dragging everyone around them along at that same speed.

Even if you get impatient, they don't budge, looking as if they are just watching the flow of the tide. Gradually, I, the one rushing them, started to feel like I was chasing the turtle I had saved. While being kept waiting with 'Yonna, yonna,' before I knew it, I was walking behind the turtle.

It was during that Dragon Palace life that I met Princess Oto. She is my future wife.

Until we got married, she was truly a Princess Oto. I had never paid the rent for the apartment we lived in together, I would go to work in clothes that were washed and neatly folded, and when I returned from work, there would be more side dishes. Life went on even without me saying anything. I was seriously spoiled back then, thinking that the Dragon Palace must be a place like this.

However, Princess Oto is four years older than me. She wouldn't just smile and wait forever. 'So, when are we getting married?' she would ask, moving the conversation forward with a gentle face. The Dragon Palace had a deadline. The wave called 'around thirty' that I had seen in the distance was quietly approaching my feet.

Even so, when you live the same way every day, only the word 'shiranfuna' (pretending not to know) becomes convenient. Before I knew it, I had become a turtle, let alone an 'isujun' (a person who is always in a hurry).

About three years into that kind of life, the 'chimudondon' (heart-pounding excitement) suddenly arrived. In the Dragon Palace, important conversations begin once your stomach is full. Princess Oto decides the timing for returning home. One day, I was handed a marriage registration form called a 'Tamatebako' (treasure box).

For a moment, Princess Oto holding the treasure box looked like a 'majimum' (evil spirit). I didn't think about anything unnecessary on the spot, and as I wrote my name as told, the wind of reality that had been stopped until then began to blow through the Dragon Palace.

The first thing that washed up on the beach was the greeting to Princess Oto's parents living in Tokyo. Words like 'greeting,' 'formal attire,' and 'common sense,' which had been swaying offshore until then, came up to my feet like waves.

The problem was that I didn't have any of those things. I didn't even know what to wear to avoid being rude, and when I imagined what a pathetic sight I would be, I wanted to crawl into a shell right then and there.

I was working at a diving shop without even knowing how to tie a necktie. I went out to the sea from morning until night. It was fine if my clothes got wet as long as they dried, and I wore 'gyosan' (beach sandals) all year round.

Even if I wanted to look it up, it was still the era of feature phones. It wasn't convenient enough to get the right answer on the spot just because I was in trouble. I wish she had at least packed a set of nice clothes inside the treasure box.

However, it didn't even come with an instruction manual. I was flustered, not knowing what to wear to go to Tokyo, let alone formal attire.

Then one day, when I stopped by a convenience store on my way home from work, my feet stopped at the magazine shelf.

When I flipped through the FINEBOYS I picked up, it was written in big letters: 'Surf shorts are hot this summer!' When I was in high school, I used to look at FINEBOYS whenever I was unsure about clothes, and if FINEBOYS said so, there was no mistake.

Above all, I wear surf shorts all the time. In fact, I'm quite particular about them. Billabong, REEF, Hurley, RVCA, Quick Silver. That's because the only place for a man of the sea to be fashionable is in surf shorts.

I'm not even losing to the models in the magazine in terms of 'gyaru-o' (gal-boy) level. Every day, I get tanned pitch-black at the sea, my hair is bleached blonde, and I still have the shaggy cut. I couldn't stop grinning, thinking, 'What if I get scouted in Tokyo?'

Yes, the treasure box had fallen at the convenience store.
FINEBOYS was the treasure box.

After I got home, I told Princess Oto right away, and she replied lightly, 'That's great, that's great.' When I asked if I should just buy a suit, she said, 'You don't have to be that enthusiastic. My dad wears 'suteteko' (long underwear) and a tank top inside the house, and nobody cares about clothes. It's a waste just to buy them,' she told me.

With this, all my worries were solved. I just had to go to Tokyo in my usual outfit. I decided to carefully select my surf shorts and go in a polo shirt with the shop's name on it. Since I had just become independent, I thought it would also serve as an advertisement just by walking around the city.


The day to finally go to Tokyo arrived. Since it was my first time in Tokyo, I really wanted to see the Gundam, so I decided to go to Odaiba immediately after arriving.

Although the Rainbow Bridge was visible in front of me and there was a seaside park underneath, it seemed like I was the only one who had mistaken the season. Even looking around, there was no one wearing surf shorts.

Is it because everyone is too fair-skinned to have the confidence to show their legs...? I thought lightly, but since I was excited by the extraordinary, I was more interested in the Gundam and Fuji TV than that. Even after that, every time I remembered, I looked around, but I couldn't find anyone wearing shorts in the first place. Even the shortest ones were 7/10 length cropped pants.

'They don't know about surf shorts. Trends are always started by FINEBOYS, but since they write with goals like 'shave your leg hair,' everyone only wears cropped pants.'

I tried shouting at the Gundam, but Char replied in a bitter tone, '7/10 length pants are coming from all four directions.' Apparently, while I was spending time in the Dragon Palace, the time on land had moved ahead.

Disappointed, I left the Gundam and headed to Princess Oto's parents' house. My father-in-law who welcomed me was truly wearing suteteko. I was more surprised to see '7/10 length' here than the suteteko. Even the green clothes he wore on top were 7/10 length, so when I thought there might be turtles in Tokyo too, it was so funny that the line 'Please give me your daughter' was washed away offshore. Seeing my father-in-law bowing his head, saying, 'Thank you for taking such a daughter,' the time I had spent worrying so much that I wanted to crawl into a shell flowed away with it.


The next day, I decided to go to Shibuya. I bought new surf shorts for this day. By wearing crisp surf shorts that I hadn't even gotten wet yet, I felt like I had already won.

I had felt it vaguely since I was on the train, but as expected, there was no one wearing shorts, let alone surf shorts. Even though it was July, salarymen were wearing suits while sweating. I felt once again that I was glad I didn't have a job that required wearing a suit.

Arriving in Shibuya, I first took a picture with Hachiko. After that, I crossed the scramble crossing many times. Princess Oto was amazed, asking, 'How many times do you want to cross it?' but I felt like it wouldn't be strange if surf shorts appeared from some corner.

However, no matter how many times I crossed, I couldn't find them. In the first place, there were no tanned gals. At first, I suspected it was because it was a weekday, but even when I entered Center-gai, the gals I had imagined were nowhere to be found.

Princess Oto said, 'Maybe they are in Harajuku,' so we decided to go there. When I passed through Omotesando on the way, I realized that I was out of place here. I, reflected in the window, looked like someone who had just come back from the sea alone. I hurriedly left the glittering street and decided to enter Takeshita Street.

I looked around a few clothing stores, but they didn't sell surf shorts in the first place. What they were selling were nothing but cropped pants. Above all, it was a clothing store. I thought the staff would talk to me more, but not a single person spoke to me. They were serving other customers, but no one came to me.

Even if this is normal in Okinawa, in Harajuku, I was just a guy who had just come back from the sea. Apparently, I had chosen the wrong place to open the treasure box... I finally realized it. I should have realized it when I wasn't even scouted with 'Hey, you're super cool' before entering the clothing store.

When I entered a clothing store in Ura-Harajuku, I decided to talk to the staff myself. When I asked, 'Are surf shorts not popular in Tokyo?', I got an answer I hadn't expected. 'This is a clothing store' ... I know that! I lightly retorted in my heart, but I calmly confirmed, 'I heard that surf shorts are hot this summer?' Then, 'Where are they popular?' ... I was answered with a question.

Surf shorts were not popular in Tokyo. I felt incredibly embarrassed that I was wearing the surf shorts I had bought in a happy mood. I bought one pair of the so-called cropped pants recommended by the staff who looked fashionable, and hurriedly changed into them on the spot. However, the legs reflected in the mirror looked older than when I came back from the sea, and I never wore them again after returning to Okinawa.


Magazines arrive late in Okinawa. Jump is released on Tuesday. I wonder which Tokyo the FINEBOYS I picked up at the convenience store that day was showing. Before the distance, the length of time was buggy.