Speaking of the Kanji that represents 2025
https://note.com/5elements/n/nc6f75bcfd5b
This time of year has come around again!
The Kanji for 2025 was "Bear" (Kuma), wasn't it.
Huh? Bear?! was my honest reaction.
Now, when I look back at myself, it's difficult.
I think I muttered last year too that I couldn't express it in a single character.
Come to think of it, was last year "Advance" (Shin)?
As for candidates for this year, maybe:
Spirit, Different, Strange, Big
or something like that.
I had been feeling a sense of discomfort with my work since around February.
But I thought it would be okay.
In May, the discomfort remained as it was, and by June, the idea of resigning flickered through my mind.
By September, I resigned myself to the fact that it wouldn't last, and in December, I thought about going freelance, but I decided to use my paid leave and resign in November.
Until I decided to resign, my feelings went up and down every day.
I'm glad I didn't quit, no, maybe it's impossible after all.
I think that I am able to move because I work and get paid, and I went out more than staying at home.
I was grateful for the stimulation I got from going out, and I was relieved that I was able to move.
Even though I'm moving, are you okay? Do you understand? Is it okay to stay like this? A knock comes from the door behind me.
You're aware of it, aren't you, that sense of discomfort.
It'll be okay, I'll manage, I'm doing the work I love now, just a little longer, even though it wasn't just my imagination.
As a result, I resigned from the company with impulsive momentum.
Entering December, I was turned down for the first time by a company I had intended to work for with reduced hours from January to March.
Not the 'discomfort' (iwakan) character, but 'different' (i).
I realize, oh, am I the one who is different?
Well, I felt like I couldn't recover.
I even wondered if I was a foreign object.
So, up to this point, these are Kanji with negative elements.
While noticing the discomfort, I left it to the flow, thinking it would be okay.
There were encounters.
I felt joy as my knowledge increased while working.
I thought that even after passing 50, I could still acquire knowledge.
There might have been arrogance too.
There must have been.
Even so, there was work, and I moved forward every day.
I am growing.
If you compare it to the flow of a river, there are rapids, calm spots, and times when it stops.
Maybe the reason I left it alone even though I noticed it was because I was riding the flow.
Resigning from work, doing the fortune-telling stall I had decided not to do this year, and going to Taiwan, even though the timing was off,
wasn't it all just riding the flow?
Thinking that, the Kanji for this year, 2025, became "Flow" (Ryu).
I think I was moving in a way that I can only think of it that way.
Whether I float or sink, I should be riding it properly.
I will flow and advance properly, and it will continue into 2026.