37/50 Looking Back on 200 Essay Articles

The total number of my essay articles has exceeded 200.

I am impressed with myself,
thinking that 200 is quite a number.

I started using note in 2016, and it is now 2021.
In other words, about five years have passed.

My surroundings and my inner self
have also changed significantly over these five years.

On the occasion of this 200-article milestone,
I would like to look back on my past essays
and trace my own transformation.

~My 5-Year Transformation~

January 25, 2016
The very first essay I wrote.
I was in the midst of worry and confusion regarding both my work and myself.
I was desperate to change myself. I was desperate to change my reality.

July 1, 2016
I resigned from my job as an elementary school teacher at the end of March 2016.
Although no articles about that remain, a sense of raw tension can be glimpsed throughout my writing. Even so, one can feel the will to move forward despite the confusion.

December 20, 2017
Changing things significantly requires changes in "environment" and "work," and while I had taken that first step, I was beginning to realize that changing the inside of my own heart was the most important thing of all.

January 6, 2018
A "vow" article that shows I steered toward my biggest theme: "Live according to my heart!"
Something definitely started moving in a big way from this day forward.

May 15, 2018
An article written after resigning from a job in developmental support that I held for nearly two years.
Beyond the step I took on my own, I encountered companions who accepted and acknowledged me as I am.

March 5, 2019
An article written after moving from the city to the countryside.
As a result of moving forward step by step while valuing "following my heart," I was liberated from the "curse of being an unlovable existence" that had long clung to my heart, and I became able to accept myself just as I am.

February 18, 2020
In my private life, I had a good encounter and was able to experience marriage. Something I could not have imagined a few years ago.
It shows that I do not view "marriage" as a goal, but rather place value on the experiences that come with it.

May 28, 2021
Over a year after marriage, I discovered I was pregnant.
By writing it down again, I was able to deeply realize the preciousness of "becoming a mom" and the gratitude for life.

If I list the events of these five years,
resignation from elementary school teaching -> job change -> relocation (job change) -> marriage -> pregnancy (maternity leave)
can be written simply, but
each step was endless, a series of confusion and conflict. And it can be said that what changed even more than my environment was my "inner self."

Along with that inner change, I think the stage I am in naturally changed as well.

I hope to continue walking even more freely, following the dictates of my heart.

I look forward to seeing what kind of scenery awaits me ahead.


And...
one last thing I want to add.

Over the past five years, although there were times when updates stopped, I am truly glad that I was able to write down my thoughts and my state of mind at the time on note.

Looking back like this, I can realize that I have walked an amazing path, and I feel that the very act of "writing in sentences" has served as a foothold for deepening my thoughts and walking in my own way.

That is why I am glad I did note!

That is what I wanted to say at the end.

I wrote this article as one of my
"50 things to try!",
"Reaching 200 essay articles on note!"
.

I have also added it to a magazine, so I would be very happy if you could take a look at it♪

Thank you for reading until the end!